Preface, Forword, and Introduction

This blog is about women. Let it be known, however, that I hold the firm belief that people are people. That is, despite all of the cultural and biological differences between men in general and women in general, there is far more variation among individuals. So this blog isn't about any sort of flag-planting, women-are-better nonsense. Simply, this blog is about an idealized female-ness, something that will resound with some women. This is not the kind of women's site that will offer make-up tips and product placement. Femininity has nothing to do with the color pink and high heeled shoes. It has to do with being in touch with yourself. It has to do with self-ownership.

The women of the past fought hard to break free from the subjugation they were once under. But the backlash caused culture to move too far in the other direction. Femaleness was stigmatized. There is a sentiment now that devalues all of the role models we women once had, and the necessary roles we once filled. The societal role played by a caring, self-sacrificing motherly woman. Or the role of the priestess, tied to the earth, introspective. The inventive Do-it-yourselfer. The eccentric bitch. Or the clever consort, The Scheherazade and Esters of the world, changing policy with a well-placed whisper. Strong women, and womanly women.

On the other hand, we now have women contributing in traditionally male ways. This should also be celebrated, lauded. Our modern society has many routes towards whatever goal you wish. All of these roles are valid.

But then there is there are the girls and guys. Rude to everyone around them, shallow, useless, and unfulfilled. These are the stereotypical perversions of what were once solid gender roles. There a two-part division between stereotypes of men in popular culture: the man "in touch with his feminine side," and "the jerk." The same goes for women: the ideal was once solid, helpful, and intelligent. Now a stereotypical woman is a giggling, empty-headed spendthrift. No, woman isn't the correct term. I should say, the stereotypical girl.

So females are offered the false choice in todays world. Build an identity around being a tomboy, or being a girly-girl. Oh, there are different flavors of each. But that false choice neglects to mention a third option. Rather than building an identity based on flawed cultural precepts, build an identity around your individual aspirations, needs, and experiences. If a woman owns her identity and choices, she has broken through that false dichotomy. Rather than being boy-ish or girly, she is a woman. And this blog was written for her.